Can someone please explain my existence to me?
You are a personal experience within a universe of experiences. Your experience is at once composed of multiple sub-personal experiences (sensations, perceptions and drives ) and super-signifying experiences (social, cultural ideals and inspirations).
There is a corresponding impersonal context in which your personal experience takes place. It’s a bit complicated, but there is a symmetry between public and private, similar to horizontal versus vertical, in which experiences which are not yours personally are presented as objects in spatial relation. In this impersonal, public view scale and size are the relevant factors, so that your ability to participate directly is limited by the proximity of the public bodies to your own body, both in distance and scale.
Together, these two aspects of experience form a single unbroken continuum through which fantastic quantities of interrelated experiences are enacted.
Is not ‘Biology’ or ‘Evolution’ just theories on ways in which a particular “consciousness” tries to understand such mechanisms or happenings in an external world? I mean, if you really think about it, my understand and therefore definition of biology is different to yours (from your education, background, previous knowledge, common sense understanding, etc.)—but semantically we are mentioning the same world, and thus the thought I put into my head when I speak of biology is therefor different from yours; and then we can extrapolate this mistake upon thousands, therefore having a different world from each other. This “realism” cannot ultimately be considered anything constructive, and therefore we shouldn’t deem it as an experience.. no?
The thing about sense is that it is participatory. We can determine how tightly and literally our associations are bound to each other, so that we can decide whether we want to focus on the unique and idiosyncratic nature of every instant or to focus on leaps of understanding. Different ways of focusing yield different results, with particular benefits and drawbacks.